The Gray Ward of Cousland
by Flying ninja
Summary: House Cousland is known for it's proud warriors and honorable dealings. They put the well being of their family and people ahead of their own need. But even such an honorable house must eventually taste the shadows of this world. When two extremes of life meet, a shield is born for the people and a blade born for revenge.


I woke up that day as I often did, wearing full armor. I grabbed my shield and sword, placing them on my back, exiting to see my elder brother with a smile on his face. "Today is the day, brother. The arl's men should be arriving today and then father and I set off for the front lines. I'm glad you slept in your armor. It will make it that much more fitting that I beat you in a sparring match."

I smirked retorting, "Sadly, father has told me to lay off evening the score before you set out, Fergus. He didn't want me making you a bigger target for the darkspawn than your skill already does."

Fergus returned the smile and hugged me. "Well, Xilan, I can't imagine what they would think of you." Returning the hug, we were silent for a moment. Releasing it and saying nothing more, we both went about our preparations. As I often did, I went to spar with some of the guards. The new recruits needed to be hardened and I wasn't much better than they were in the eyes of our more experienced men. There was always more to learn with a blade.

But it was more than that to me. I came from a proud line of knights. Even when put into the arena of nobility, we fought with honor and cared for our own. I wanted to make them proud. My father, my grandfather, even my mabari of a brother, Fergus. I got so caught up in this that I nearly missed my father's summons. Looking for my friend, Steve I rolled my eyes. He was probably off getting in trouble. He was brilliant but if I didn't keep an eye on him, he always slipped off through the castle and had what I had come to call 'adventures'. Pain in my ass adventures that usually left me cleaning up the mess. Still, the summons was more important.

As I arrived, my father was clearly making a quip. I smirked, glad I got more of that from our father than my brother did. "I'm sorry, pup. I didn't see you there. Howe, You remember my son?"

Howe smiled a bit and said, "I see he has grown into a fine young lad."

I laughed, "Good to see you are well, old timer." My father shot me a look and appeared ready to beat me to unconsciousness with my own shield.

Howe cleared his throat and, pretending as if nothing had happened he said, "My daughter Delilah asked after you. Perhaps I should bring her next time."

Bowing with a smile and some charm I replied, "I'd like that very much, sir."

Howe grumbled through a smile, "Good, she hasn't stopped talking about you since she saw you at a fair in denerim. I think you have an admirer."

I nodded thoughtfully, deciding humor wasn't the best solution when talking about his daughter in front of my father. Just as I opened my mouth, my father cut me off. "Pup, I summoned you here for a reason other than to antagonize Arl Howe. I want you to watch the castle while your brother and I are gone."

Sobering up I shook my head, "I don't really think that's necessary. Mother can run it just fine without me interfering."

My father smiled kindly, placing his hand on my shoulder saying, "You give yourself too little credit. You will need to learn it one day when you get a castle of your own." His hand gave me more confidence than my blade ever had. I nodded as he said, "Oh, I nearly forgot. Could you send Duncan in?" One of our guards saluted and did just so. A strange man entered. "This is Duncan, leader of the Grey Wardens in Ferelden. Tell me, did nan cover the grey wardens in your studies?"

I nodded and bowed in respect, "Yes. They are legendary warriors and our greatest defense against the darkspawn."

My father nodded with a smile, Duncan replying, "Your boy learns well and shows a respect that many do not. To tell the truth, I came to test Ser Gilmore but I think I see a greater recruit before me."

I leapt a bit in surprise. I was confident in my bladework but darkspawn were monsters, demons. I had no intent of testing my metal on beings few ever survived encounters with. It was best to leave that to the veterans. With much relief, I saw my father step between us. "No, I will not let you have my son."

I nodded in agreement, "I agree with my father. I have no desire to join the Wardens, though I am honored to be asked."

Duncan sighed and nodded, "I have no wish to force the issue, though I do ask that you reconsider. We need every good blade we have to address this darkspawn threat."

My father nodded and turned to me saying, "I require two things of you. First, give a message to your brother to depart without me. I will be joining him with the Arl's men later. The second is that in my absence I want you to handle all the needs of our guest."

Nodding I smirked, "As long as that need isn't facing a horde of darkspawn, I will give him whatever he cares to ask for."

My father rolled his eyes and motioned me out. Moving quickly, I ran out to try and get to my brother in a decent amount of time. That was when Ser Gilmore made an appearance. He smiled, "My lord. Your mother has told me that you have to see to your hound. He found his way into the larder again and Nan is at her wits end."

I sighed, "I knew he was up to no good when he up and disappeared on me. Well, I can handle this myself."

Ser Gilmore laughed, "I'm sure you can but your mother has told me to travel with you until you complete this task."

Grumbling I ran to the kitchen, Nan yelling her head off at the servants. I sighed and said, "I'm sorry, Nan. Leave it to me."

She grumbled, "If you can't keep that mutt in line, I'll put him down. He does nothing but cause be problems." I turned to Nan briefly, asking with my eyes if she was finished. She returned a similar look. I stepped into the larder and smiled at my dog, who seemed so happy to see me.

"Aren't you so clever? But you really should stop doing this. I think she means to skin you this time, Steve." The dog tilted its head and barked at one of the walls. I drew my blade passing on, "Ser Gilmore, quick hint. Never doubt a mabari."

Ser Gilmore seemed surprised but I was ready when the rats came out. The battle was short despite their number. Smashed half with my shield and sliced the rest of my kills with my blade. When it ended, Ser Gilmore had the poor foresight to say, "Wow, giant rats. This is like the beginning of every adventure story."

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, don't bring that up. Duncan threw around the idea of recruiting me as well as you. I didn't want anything to do with that. No offence to you, Ser Gilmore, but I have no intents of charging into that hell. I have to help take care of House Cousland. Running against darkspawn is to seek your own death."

Ser Gilmore sighed, "I disagree. If no one fights them, all of Ferelden will fall to darkness, and after Ferelden the rest of the world would follow. They are heroes for that reason. It may look insane but they fight the battles no one else can."

I nodded, "I wish you the best. I would be honored to fight alongside the wardens I just do not foresee that life for myself."

Ser Gilmore nodded, "I will leave you with your trusted hound. May your blade never falter, my lord." I nodded and he left my company.

On the way out, with my old smile returned I said, "By the way, he just saved dinner. You want to know what I mean, Nan? Check the larder." Back to running, I booked it past mother and her guests. I didn't have time for that. Killing those rats took long enough already. Seeing an old opponent in their midst, I spun around, shot a quick salute and went back to running to our quarters.

There I saw my brother with his wife and child. He was wishing them goodbye. Slipping in quietly I snarked, "Am I interrupting anything?"

Fergus smiled, "Non-sense, brother. Merely reassuring my family of my return."

I said seriously, "I would join you if father would have me."

Fergus laughed, "I doubt he would put both his heirs on the line but if it means anything to you, I will be far more careful without your shield at my back."

Offering my hand, we shook firmly, hugging as we had this morning. "You will be missed."

"I know, brother. As will you." He kept the mood light by throwing in, "If it is any consolation I will be freezing my arms off thinking of you and your warm castle." We both knew that this was far more important than that but nothing could be done. I was to keep the women and children safe in their place. They were our family's sword, I its shield.

"I will keep our kin and people safe from the chaos so you can protect them from the darkness."

Fergus seemed to let go of a breath he hadn't seemed to be holding at first. "Thank you for putting my mind to ease brother. Any news from father?"

I sighed, rolling my eyes. I had almost forgotten, "Father told you to take the troops and deploy without him. He will meet you at Ostagar along with Arl Howe's men."

Fergus sighed, "His men are still delayed? I guess it can't be helped. Tell father I will do just that."

That was when father entered. "No need. I am right here."

I grumbled, "You could have delivered the message yourself, you know."

"But then I would not see the two of you together one last time before battle."

I had to admit he had a point. Still, it was rather strange. We spent those last few moments before my brother left and we all went to rest trying to forget the war was at our door. Remind each other of life in our realm before the darkspawn began to move. I remember this as the last normal moment I ever had. My life would never be the same as it was. I would never spar with our men. I would never see Nan again. When next I would see my family and home, their memory would be forever scarred, but that one moment… It meant the world to me to have that one memory left untouched.


End file.
